The Boyfriend's guide: Be supportive When Running On Zero

The Boyfriend's guide: Be supportive When Running On Zero

(cover image credit: Christian Ferrer)

Guys, you know how it is: after a grueling day, all you might want is to collapse and recharge. But what if, as you arrive home, your partner needs you? You might think you're too worn out to be there for her, but that's not necessarily the case. What you may not realize is that she's a big girl. She knows you have your moments too, and she's capable of understanding your fatigue. This doesn't mean you can't support her, even when you're not feeling 100%. Often, your silent presence is enough; your willingness to be there, even in quiet, sends a strong message of love and support. This blog post is all about how to be that supportive partner, even when you're tired, and trusting that she's strong enough to appreciate your efforts. Let's delve into how you can maintain connection and trust, even when words fail, and energy levels are low.

When days you are also tired:

She Wants Your Attention, Not Your Solutions:

  • 🤨👎: Don't always go straight to offering solutions to get this topic over with, especially when you're too tired to fully comprehend the problem.
  • 😆👌: Express your current state and let her know that you are quietly listening, but you're tired and might not be able to respond as thoughtfully as usual, or even at all. But you want to at least be there for her.

Her Need for Emotional Security:

  • 🤨👎: Don't show frustration or impatience because you're tired.
  • 😆👌: Find common ground and offer her a quiet moment to cuddle. You can rest your eyes while she lays on your lap, reading a book or watching her favorite show. Alternatively, make her a quick drink and invite her to sit with you while you unwind and shoot some zombies. You can even ask her NICELY to let you stay in your zone while you're playing and request her not to talk to you during this time. It's okay. She's a big girl and will understand.

Quality Silence Over Brushing Off Response:

  • 🤨👎: Don't just brush her off because you need some quiet time; understand that she also knows you can have your own moments of exhaustion.
  • 😆👌: Share a genuine word of appreciation for her understanding and support when you're drained.

The Value of Non-Sexual Touch:

  • 🤨👎: View her solely as a means for sexual or stress relief.
  • 😆👌: On days when you're both exhausted, emphasizing non-sexual touch, such as cuddling or gentle head massages, can be much more effective to destress than rushing straight to the climax. Keep in mind that a solely sexual pleasure is basically chasing a "happy hormone" rush, almost like a drug. So, it's better to stop viewing your partner as your "pharmacy.

The Importance of Communication:

  • 🤨👎: Don't shut down entirely even if you're tired.
  • 😆👌: She may have had a rough day too, or her day might have gone well, and she can offer you some quiet support. Either way, let her know you had a hard day and ask for a quiet evening together.

She Needs Her Own Space Sometimes:

  • 🤨👎: Don't give her extra attention when she seems off. Read the room, she might need some alone time to process and recover.
  • 😆👌: If she requests some quiet and alone time, respect that and let her know where you'll be. Assure her that when she's ready, you'll be there for her.

Small Details Matter:

  • 🤨👎: Don't dismiss small details that matter to her as insignificant.
  • 😆👌: Not every small detail matters, but pay attention to the ones that matter to her the most and adapt accordingly. This is just mutual respect.

Her Silent Need for Help:

  • 🤨👎: Don't avoid helping her because you're too tired.
  • 😆👌: If you're exhausted, let her know you might not notice when she needs help. Encourage her to ask when necessary and find a common solution that helps both of you recover.

She Wants You to Initiate:

  • 🤨👎: Don't always wait for her to start an interaction, even when you're tired.
  • 😆👌: Sometimes the complaint is that women can be hard to please. But instead of worrying about having your ideas rejected, offer options and let her choose. This shows a level of understanding while also giving her room to make a decision.

The Importance of Emotional Availability:

  • 🤨👎: Don't shut off emotionally because you're exhausted.
  • 😆👌: Be honest about how you're feeling and ask for help instead of avoiding interaction.

Some of these suggestions might seem repetitive. But believe it or not, all she wants is to be around you in any form she is welcomed. Conflicts are happening out there every day, and your home is the only sanctuary you two are building together. It's just reasonable to treat this space, and your time together, delicately.

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